Phobias plagueing the poor ol' game coots...LONG

Jan 24, 2005, 11:48 PM

In the hopes that we could all help our beloved rivals figure out why they suck at life, I have compiled a list of possible phobias they must overcome in order to soothe some of the wounds left by their constant defeats.

THINGS THEY ARE AFRAID OF:

Acrophobia-fear of heights (that's why they tend to stay at the bottom)

Agliophobia- Fear of pain (reason they play like peewees)

Agoraphobia- Fear of open spaces or of being in crowded, public places like markets.(hence why they choke in front of big crowds)

Ailurophobia- Fear of cats.(this includes Tigers I assume)

Alektorophobia- Fear of chickens.(just thought I'd throw that one in there)

Anablephobia- Fear of looking up(a direct result from looking at the scoreboard and being turned away in shame time after time)

Arithmophobia- Fear of numbers.(the main reason they don't put up many.. in anything)

Astrophobia- Fear of stars or celestial space(reason they don't like playing at night)

Aurophobia- Fear of gold.(Now we know why they settle for second place every year)

Catoptrophobia- Fear of mirrors.(I'd have a hard time looking at myself too if I got embarrassed that often)

Epistemophobia- Fear of knowledge (I'm not calling them dumb but I am calling them stupid.. hehe)

Kopophobia- Fear of fatigue.(we dont want the poor babies to get tired do we? in a nutshell they give up after three quarters)

Ligyrophobia- Fear of loud noises. (didn't I hear something about death valley and a richter scale before??? maybe not)

Tyrannophobia- Fear of tyrants.(like the mean ol' bowden fella. he's a mean one i tell ya)

NOW THINGS THEY AREN'T SCARED OF:

Cleptophobia- Fear of stealing.(well God, that's obvious)

Cyberphobia- Fear of computers or working on a computer.(same as above)

Hobophobia- Fear of bums or beggars(most of them are majoring in hobo)

Oneirogmophobia- Fear of wet dreams.(how can any guy be afraid of these? c'mon!)

Zelophobia- Fear of jealousy.(it's obvious that they want to be where clemson is in athletics. so much that they try to bring us down. nice try)

SORRY THIS POST WAS SO LONG. HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT.

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Phobias plagueing the poor ol' game coots...LONG

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Well done ol' chap***

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