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Replies: 7
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Ultimate Tiger [34489]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 10753
Joined: 2014
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Hump Day 'Dad Joke' crossing...beware...
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Nov 19, 2025, 7:44 AM
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Aah, the week's 'speed bump' has arrived! Just when you thought cruise control would get you through it all...oops! It doesn't matter the day of the week, though, as this clever little band of misfits is 'all in' on needling whatever misery tries to toss our way...and we're not stopping anytime soon!
I joined a few friends the other night...promising Mrs. Salty I'd be home by midnight. A few beers...laughs...easy peasy!
Midnight came...went...along with 1AM...2AM...and no thought of headed home. (Stupid me...well versed in stupid, I might add!)
By 3AM...a bit buzzed...decided it's time to sneak back home.
As I opened the door, the cuckoo clock 'sang' three times. I froze! Worried Mrs. Salty would awake, I thought quickly how to avoid confrontation. So, I cleverly added 'cuckoos'...carefully timed, with pauses to sound natural...despite my racing heart...and hopes avoiding trouble.
Later the next morning, she asked what time I got home. "Midnight," I smiled. She didn't seem the least suspicious. "Whew!", I thought.
Then she looked at the cuckoo clock and said, "We need a new one." "Why?", I asked.
"Last night it cuckooed three times, said, "Oh, crap," cleared its throat, giggled, tripped over the cat, and 'far-ted'." 
Have a splendid day, Tiger Nation! Go Tigers, ALWAYS!
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Rival Killer [2978]
TigerPulse: 100%
33
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Hump day!
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Nov 19, 2025, 7:52 AM
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Why do walruses like a Tupperware party?
They’re always on the lookout for a tight seal.
Happy Wednesday!
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Oculus Spirit [42776]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 15784
Joined: 2014
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Re: Hump Day 'Dad Joke' crossing...beware...
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Nov 19, 2025, 7:58 AM
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A teacher asked her fourth grade class to name things that ended with "tor" and that also ate things. The first little boy said, "Alligator."
"Excellent, Jimmy, that's a big word."
The next boy said, "Predator." "Yes, that's another big word Mike, great job."
Little Johnny says, "Vibrator." After nearly falling off her chair, the teacher says, "That's a big word Johnny, but it doesn't eat anything." Johnny replies, "Well, my mom has one and she says it eats batteries like there's no tomorrow!"
WHAT IF THEY'RE NOT STARS BUT, HOLES POKED INTO THE TOP OF THE CONTAINER SO WE CAN BREATHE?
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Legend [6744]
TigerPulse: 100%
41
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Re: Hump Day 'Dad Joke' crossing...beware...
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Nov 19, 2025, 8:07 AM
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I told a lady in the supermarket that she drew her eyebrows too high.
She looked surprised.
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Clemson Sports Icon [56871]
TigerPulse: 100%
59
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Re: Hump Day 'Dad Joke' crossing...beware...
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Nov 19, 2025, 8:25 AM
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1,000 lbs of hair was stolen from a wig company.
Police are combing the area.
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Paw Warrior [5025]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Hump Day 'Dad Joke' crossing...beware...
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Nov 19, 2025, 8:27 AM
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What happens if you get scared half to death twice? :0)
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Oculus Spirit [42776]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 15784
Joined: 2014
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Re: Hump Day 'Dad Joke' crossing...beware...
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Nov 19, 2025, 9:09 AM
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+1 for a Steven Wright classic. Here’s another:
I plan to live forever. So far, so good.
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [109513]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 27139
Joined: 2006
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lol, +1***
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Nov 19, 2025, 8:35 AM
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