Tangent to the friend fallout: Don't be jealous.

Dec 8, 2023, 11:07 AM

So Wife-of has a college friend with an enviable life. Friend's husband has some kind of banking/trading job and has made tons of money. They live in a big house in one of the most expensive neighborhoods in a big city, kids in private school. Husband's family is loaded too, like ferrari collection loaded. Friend didn't have to work and stayed home with the kids, even when kids were old enough to be in school. We get one of those letters every year from them at Christmas that lists all of the international trips and expensive hobbies and annual home renovations and fancy cars and all of the great things about their great life.

So Friend contacted Wife-of a few months ago and said she was going to be in town for HS age kid's sports tournament and wanted to get together for dinner.

Wife-of admitted to me beforehand that she didn't really want to go see her friend because she felt jealous of her friend's fabulous life.

At dinner, Wife-of asks about friend's husband, because maybe we didn't get one of those Christmas brag letters last year.

Welp, turns out...

During covid, husband decided he was going to invest some of his piles of money into real estate, and he starts buying up stuff - with loans, of course. Multiple states, and I think a mix of commercial, residential, speculative, etc...everything. He charters jets to go see these places and make these deals. He decides he is a real estate genius and quits his lucrative banking/trading job so he can do this full time.

Also, he's having some mental health issues. And starts abusing alcohol and cocaine. Meanwhile, time passes and now he hasn't earned any income in 3+ years. Savings are gone. His millions in real estate loans have all gone bad, and they have no way to pay. There are lawyers in multiple states trying to clear all of this up. Husband had made all of these deals pretty much on his own and his wife is now having to deal with the fallout, because he is incapable. Husband is pretty much checked out from reality and still spending money by the fistful. Now friend is having to follow up on her husband and cancel jet charters, credit cards, and purchases he is still making.

They are still in the house, for now, because husband refuses to sell. Not sure how long they can keep it. Kids are still in private school, but they are now on scholarship because they can't possibly pay. Friend has now gone back to work but after a decade + of not working she is starting over at the bottom. Husband is now back at commission-only job, but after a few months still hasn't earned any commission, and is still struggling with mental health and addiction.

Oh, and Husband's rich family can't help, because as it turns out, they are now broke too, for similar reasons. Friend has no real family to lean on, either. With a lot of luck and her hard work they might be able to stay in the house and school while HS kid finishes school, but doubtful MS kid makes it through.

Wife-of comes home from dinner after learning all of this. No longer jealous, now she's feeling awfully sorry for her friend, and now awfully thrilled with our normal, regular, UDP life.

So...TLDR: don't be jealous.

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How much money they have, how he retired early, how awesome their mountain house and RV is..etc. Apparently these folks are the best, richest people on the planet. So I've been told.

Husband of friend of invited me to go watch a game and hang out with Mr Big at a local bar. At first Mr Big seemed normal. He's a big dude-probably 6'3 and 275-290. No muscle, but a big guy. I am not a big guy, but I've met/know a lot of bug dudes, and me being short isn't a huge surprise to me when I wake up because I've been this size my whole life.

For whatever reason rich guy gets two drinks in him and decides he's going to remind me..several times, how short I am. I was perplexed by this; he's the rich one who is retired. He won. I'm just a short dude who has a job and will probably never retire. To him, and most people (and me, most days), I'm just another NPC.

Finally, after about the 4th time in 2 hours after meeting the guy he randomly jokes about my height again. At that point, I had heard it enough, and asked him if why he seems to have a problem with my height. He's mentioned it several times, and I'm just wondering what he is attempting to prove. He starts floundering all over himself sort of apologizing, and says again "well, you are short."

At that point I'm like I gotta go guys..y'all have fun. I still don't get his obsession with my height..especially from someone I've never met before.

A few weeks later, friends of's wife asked what I thought of Mr. Big and his wife..so I let her know and she is all surprised and doesn't understand why he acted like that..and asks me "What did you do to him?"

I just rolled my eyes and walked outside.

Tangent to the friend fallout: Don't be jealous.

lots of folks are living behind false fronts and/or very fragile circumstances

It's funny, after I learned all of this I started thinking about all of the rich

Wife of has friends that are always bragging about a couple they know.

Sounds like you were the problem here.

Appaerntly that dude doesn't see many of us in his world.

I thought a ton of the rich and famous were actually short,

That must have not been included in my short gene.

Maybe he thought you were going to come up

I'll let others decide, but that seems like a swing and a miss to me

lol . . . .***

Re: Maybe he thought you were going to come up

His ackward way of hinting for a

I bet he was nuts over IE.***

I dunno. I found it odd.

Hey, one detail needed here.

Ironically he's densely constructed.***

5'8 on a good day.***

Look man, together we make 11'4 so let's get together and go kick

Re: Look man, together we make 11'4 so let's get together and go kick

I'm not trying to make you feel better, but that's like

Yeah, he looked 20-30lbs overweight to me

Lutz. Let's just say I have a "friend" who is currently locked up in

I got 99 problems

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