Re: 'The Taxman Cometh' for Tuesday Dad Jokes! Pay up!

Salty55® · 2025-04-15T12:00:58.411Z

Had a car accident today...the other driver was a midget. When he hopped down out of the car he said, "I'm not Happy!" So I asked, "Which one are you then?" Boss: 'What are you doing?" Me: "Watching a video on how to deal effectively with co-workers." Boss: "That's kickboxing!" Me: "Exactly!" When people talk about 30 years ago, I immediately think the 70's...but they mean 1995...and now I need to go lay down! Yep! And closing with this little gem of perspective... Men at 25 play football...at 40, they play tennis. When they're 60, it's all about golf. Seems the reality is as you age, your balls get smaller. Selah! Own this day, T-Net! Own it!

Jedi Kermit®

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Apr 15, 2025, 8:07 AM

What do Lifesaver candies do that men cannot? Come in 5 different flavors.

Two old ladies are sitting at a bus stop, smoking. It begins to rain, and one old lady pulls out a condom, stretches it out, snips the tip off, and puts it over her cigarette so she can smoke without her cigarette getting damp. The other old lady thinks it's a nifty trick and asks her what she put over her cigarette. The lady replies that it is a condom and that you can buy it at a pharmacy. The second old lady thanks her, and makes a note to pick one up when she gets her prescription filled later that week.
Sure enough, a few days later, she enters the pharmacy, goes up to the young man working the counter, and says, "Young man, I would like to buy a condom, please."
The young man is taken aback by her advanced age, and replies, "Wow. Good for you! No one has ever asked me for help with that before…um. What size do you need?"
The old woman pauses, then replies, "I need one that will fit a camel."