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Orange Immortal [63174]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 1998
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So how was your morning APM? Well, let me tell you.
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Dec 20, 2024, 9:49 AM
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As I was wrapping up my morning pre-shower routine I innocently posted about my mug and learned what we all now know about these paper airplanes and secret books.
Headed up to take my shower and started taking stuff out of my toilet kit and promptly cut myself on my razor, started bleeding like a stuck pig. BUT I had to drop a massive deuce and it could not wait. So there I sat dropping while simultaneously applying pressure to my finger. Problem is, it is my right index finger, the finger on my wiping hand. OK. Fine. Improvise. Adapt. Overcome. I flush and figure I will go lefty but alas, the toilet clogged, as it often does when I drop a man-sized deuce. So here I am, bleeding like a stuck pig, tights pulled down around my ankles, and toilet clogged. And I still haven't shaved or showered.
Anyhow, to wrap this sordid tale up, I put on a waterproof Bandaid and shaved and showered.
I am still bleeding BTW.
Hope you have a better Friday than I have had so far.
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Clemson Sports Icon [57354]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 13654
Joined: 2018
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Crazy. They say that's how King Tut died.***
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Dec 20, 2024, 9:53 AM
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Top TigerNet [30766]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2001
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Re: Crazy. They say that's how King Tut died.***
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Dec 20, 2024, 9:55 AM
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Campus Hero [13631]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 18439
Joined: 2000
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TigerNet Icon [155478]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 45298
Joined: 2007
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Well
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Dec 20, 2024, 10:02 AM
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are you unwiped as well?
Put an ice cube on your finger and hold it over your head.
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Heisman Winner [81475]
TigerPulse: 100%
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I got to have seggs this morning so it was pretty good.
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Dec 20, 2024, 10:05 AM
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TigerNet Legend [146474]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Wife didn't hear the sobbing noises coming from the shower?***
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Dec 20, 2024, 11:04 AM
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Heisman Winner [81475]
TigerPulse: 100%
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I honestly dont even remember the last time I JOed
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Dec 20, 2024, 12:33 PM
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I just don’t do it bc my wife is always willing to accommodate me unless we are in an argument, which isn’t much.
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TigerNet Champion [112971]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2002
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This might be a better humble brag than someone offering free
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Dec 20, 2024, 3:04 PM
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round trip to a playoff game in Austin.
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Clemson Sports Icon [57354]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2018
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It would be, but a really good humblebrag has to be somewhat believable.***
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Dec 20, 2024, 3:14 PM
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Heisman Winner [81122]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2003
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If I cut myself shaving, it seems like I COULD have bled to death, being on that
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Dec 20, 2024, 10:28 AM
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dayumed blood thinner. Thankfully, Cardio Doc told me last visit I can permanently stop that chit, since it has now been over a year since I got the stent screwed in place. YAY!
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [98812]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 97990
Joined: 2009
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Same here.
Dec 20, 2024, 2:59 PM
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The wind across my arms and hands makes me bleed. I've talked to dozens of people who pointed out that I was bleeding. I've looked down on a piece I was working on and realized I was bleeding.
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Orange Immortal [63174]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 37999
Joined: 1998
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Clemson Sports Icon [57354]
TigerPulse: 100%
59
Posts: 13654
Joined: 2018
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How does poosietelephone post only have one TU?***
Dec 20, 2024, 4:21 PM
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TigerNet Legend [146474]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 66443
Joined: 2000
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I think you may have just crawled inside the female brain
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Dec 20, 2024, 11:02 AM
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and deconstructed their emotional rollercoasters.
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Top TigerNet [30243]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2014
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please cool it with all the seggsy poop and blood talk
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Dec 20, 2024, 11:26 AM
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Orange Immortal [63174]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 1998
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Too gheyish or what?***
Dec 20, 2024, 12:41 PM
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [98812]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2009
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You need to answer a few questions before I comment.
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Dec 20, 2024, 2:53 PM
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Do you still use a straight razor?
What backed you up for far that you clogged the torelt?
Do you take blood thinners?
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Orange Immortal [63174]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 37999
Joined: 1998
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To answer the other questions: 1) Gillette 5-blader. Freak accident.
Dec 20, 2024, 4:37 PM
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Had to do with my finger catch the trimming blade at just the right angle.
2) I ate some serious fruit and veg yesterday and it cleared me out. Colon clean as a whistle.
3) No blood thinners but after the exercise the blood was in prime shape to flow freely.
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TigerNet Immortal [168954]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2013
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So, uh, you wear "tights"?***
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Dec 20, 2024, 3:31 PM
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TigerNet Legend [146474]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Haha, I reread his post and realized how under the radar that word flew.
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Dec 20, 2024, 3:38 PM
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That should have been everybody's first question.
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Orange Immortal [63174]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 37999
Joined: 1998
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Heisman Winner [86897]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2004
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Why you gotta where running tights if you are walking?***
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Dec 20, 2024, 3:54 PM
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Orange Immortal [63174]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 37999
Joined: 1998
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Cold weather tights.***
Dec 20, 2024, 4:16 PM
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Orange Immortal [63174]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 37999
Joined: 1998
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Orange Blooded [2224]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Can you post a pig of your bra next?***
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Dec 20, 2024, 4:35 PM
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TigerNet Immortal [168954]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 70239
Joined: 2013
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Heisman Winner [86897]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 59952
Joined: 2004
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or tough it out for the 20 min walk
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Dec 20, 2024, 4:20 PM
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But I don't do cold or running, so what do I know.
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TigerNet Immortal [168954]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 70239
Joined: 2013
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In fairness
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Dec 20, 2024, 4:23 PM
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He isn’t doing running.
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Heisman Winner [86897]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 59952
Joined: 2004
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Maybe I need some tights
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Dec 20, 2024, 4:36 PM
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I could burn them in my front yard fire pit.
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Replies: 29
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