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Replies: 11
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Ultimate Tiger [34371]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
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Joined: 2014
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'Dad Jokes' and Slow times on T-Net
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Nov 13, 2025, 7:57 AM
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I guess folks can only handle 'whine' for so long and then they need an outlet! Then again, you all brought it yesterday...the cream rises to the top, yeah? 
So...'Just Three Words'...
An 84 year old 'ute' is having a drink at the bar when a stunning young woman enters. Sitting a few seats away, he simply can't take his eyes off of her. After a short while, she notices and approaches him. Before he can apologize, she looks him deep in the eyes and says in a sultry tone, "I'll do anything you like. Anything you can imagine in your wildest dreams. How extreme or unusual, it doesn't matter. I want a $100 and there's another condition."
Completely stunned by the turn of events, he asks what the condition is.
"You have to tell me what you want in Just Three Words."
He takes a moment to consider her offer, then whips out his wallet and hands her $100. He then looks her in the eyes and says slowly and clearly, "Paint My House."
You see, our needs change as we get older and we tend to look for bargains! 
Find your bargain today, Tiger Nation! Go Tigers, ALWAYS!
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Paw Warrior [4999]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: 'Dad Jokes' and Slow times on T-Net
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:00 AM
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How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch! :0)
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Tiger Titan [46632]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Gardener
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:03 AM
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Legend [6713]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: 'Dad Jokes' and Slow times on T-Net
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:06 AM
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If Cinderella’s shoe fit so perfectly why did it fall off in the first place
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [109419]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
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Joined: 2006
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lol***
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:06 AM
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Clemson Sports Icon [56750]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: 'Dad Jokes' and Slow times on T-Net
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:29 AM
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Therapist: “How do we deal with someone who hates us for no reason?”
Patient: “Give them a reason.”
Therapist: “Wrong answer!”
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Heisman Winner [83108]
TigerPulse: 100%
62
Posts: 122221
Joined: 1998
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Re: 'Dad Jokes' and Slow times on T-Net- it's hoops season
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:37 AM
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when you check the origins of the game it took 15 years for them to remove the bottom from the basket. For years they just used a stick to boke the ball out from a small hole in the bottom each time a ball went in it.
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Paw Warrior [4999]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: 'Dad Jokes' and Slow times on T-Net- it's hoops season
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:44 AM
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Baskets were precious back in those days. They were needed for the harvest.
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Starter [286]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: 'Dad Jokes' and Slow times on T-Net
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:45 AM
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Apparently the Northern Lights were visible in Alabama Tuesday night. Millions of Alabamans brushed their tooth for the first time expecting to meet St Peter.
Ironically the toothbrush was invented in Alabama. Anywhere else and it would have been called a teethbrush.
Message was edited by: TigerRancher®
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Rival Killer [2947]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: The man's daughter asked her mom,
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Nov 13, 2025, 8:51 AM
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"Mommy, why were you bouncing on Daddy's belly last night?"
Mom tells her that she has to do that so Daddy's belly doesn't get too big and he can stay skinny.
The little girl tells her mom, "That's not going to work, the babysitter keeps blowing it back up.
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Ultimate Tiger [34371]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
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Joined: 2014
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Re: The man's daughter asked her mom,
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Nov 13, 2025, 9:00 AM
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Rival Killer [2786]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Happy Thursday!
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Nov 13, 2025, 9:01 AM
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I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
I told my therapist I have a fear of commitment. Now she's avoiding me.
I use to think I was indecisive but now I'm not too sure.
I'm no good at math but I know 5 out of 4 people struggle with it.
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