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Hypothetical perfect ending to this football season:
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Hypothetical perfect ending to this football season:


Dec 13, 2013, 12:31 PM

Clemson beats OSU in Orange Bowl 70-0. The WVU debacle is forgotten about and never mentioned again because of the blowout OSU loss. Sammy decides to stay at CU. ESPN now describes any team that loses a game they aren't supposed to as "buckeyeing".

SCU loses to Wisconsin, BIG!! The Wisconsin RB hits and runs over Clowney and knocks his helmet off. The replay is shown over and over and over and over on ESPN for the next 6 months proclaiming the Wisconsin RB the best ball carrier in the history of football. After the hit, Clowney can't read. ;) Steve Spurrier retires and never wears a shirt again, even at Augusta National. He is kicked out of the club, his wife leaves him and takes all his money, and he ends up living in a KOA campground getting plastered on Milwaukee's Best every night until Todd Ellis adopts him.

FSU tramples Auburn in BCS Championship. Jimbo Fisher finds a feces covered horseshoe at midfield after he shakes hands with Malzahn. Fisher, thinking it's from Chief Osceola's horse, and not Malzahn's ###, gives it back to the Chief who quickly contracts Hepatitis B from it.

Jameis Winston's accuser is discovered to have been hired by ESPN and the SEC to discredit an ACC Heisman candidate. She is arrested and the SEC commish is fired. The SEC network is cancelled.

Jameis Winston says, "I told you I was innocent of rape", while being arrested for robbing a Dillard's shoe department. He is put in jail for three years and loses all of his eligibility.

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