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YOUR BALANCE
Been a rough few weeks for me
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Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 12:58 PM

Going through a surprise divorce. It’s amazing how small Clemson Football seems during this time. Not to be too personal but what gets me through each week is watching our Tigers play

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:02 PM

Sorry to hear that, man. I’ll be praying for you. Just do the best you can. God be with you.

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:03 PM

Keep your head up, life is full of ups and downs for everyone. Better times are in your future.

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It Hurts & It took me few yrs & a lot of tears..


Oct 5, 2018, 1:09 PM

to get right but then I amazingly hit a plateau & never dwelled on her afterwards after 29 yrs of dating & marriage..and last 15+ yrs of those 31 divorced yrs we’ve been very amicable & shared Thanksgiving & Christmas & Children’s birthdays..

and I’ve met & liked her 3rd husband (who recently died from her great home cooking, as 2nd one did too ??)..and she’s now feeding #4 That fried chicken, biscuits, gravy, bacon & 4-layer Caramel cake!

Thus, I know some of your deep mental pain Alum07 & just say stay focused on yourself, don’t take all the blame, exercise for good physical-mental chemistry, seek pro help if needed, stay busy with Clemson sports & work (plus I took up ballroom dancing & met a lovely young woman who for 8 years kept me busy).

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Re: It Hurts & It took me few yrs & a lot of tears..


Oct 5, 2018, 6:56 PM

That’s the funniest thing I had read in here in quite a while. 2nd and 3rd husbands died from her great home cooking. She must have taken advantage of the fact that she was the benificiary of their life insurance policies.
Bill you got out at a good time!!??

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Re: It Hurts & It took me few yrs & a lot of tears..


Oct 5, 2018, 8:25 PM

Blanch Taylor Moore? She cooked up some killer food too

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We do Chicken right...it's not just for frying anymore!


Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:04 PM

Going through a divorce is a horrible time in life. I wish you the best, and hope it won’t be a long drawn out thing.

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:09 PM

Sorry you are having to go through this. At my old age I can tell you that no life is free of some hard times and sorrow but the good does outweigh the bad. But you do need to take notice of the good and be thankful for it. Time will help heal this wound.

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:09 PM

#### sorry to hear that. I don’t know if you have children, but if you do remember that emotionally this is a really tough time for them. I hope things can be worked out civilly, 30 years ago my ex played serious mind games with our children that ended up hurting their relationship until he died. Prayers that you get through this as painlessly as possible

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Go Tigers! Once A Tiger Always A Tiger


Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:23 PM

Yes two. Very young. 4 and 2

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That's actually good.


Oct 5, 2018, 1:42 PM

They are too young to understand and won't remember much if anything at all. My children were 3 and 5 when I got divorced. All worked out for the better. I put my business and life on hold so that I could do the best job possible raising them. It was worth it. 20 years later and my kids and I are still very close. I had a nasty divorce, but I always did my best to keep the kids out of it.

Hang in there, it will get better...much better, but it's going to take awhile.

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Re: That's actually good.


Oct 5, 2018, 3:08 PM

From a financial view that is 16 years of child support, not to mention losing 1/2 of all you got.

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Money is replaceable


Oct 5, 2018, 3:20 PM

I had custody. Gave up about 1/2 what I had. I never did get one dime of child support and never really wanted it either. Custody was never really an issue though.

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 2:21 PM [ in reply to Re: Been a rough few weeks for me ]

But Jean, how can a person live with another person day in and day out and not suspect that something isn't quite right in the marriage. Man or woman, the moment a marriage is consummated, the love blinders need to come off and work on building an equal marriage with your eyes wide open all the time. A 50-50 relationship will never work bc it will take a 100% both ways or it will fail before it ever had a chance!!! Even with 1 giving 100% and the other giving a solid 75%, it will fail in time, usually after there are several kids in the mix.

Marriages these days are a everyday commitment, and if it's not worth a everyday 100% commitment, why waste a week disguising it as 100%. Get out of it and start again looking for that right one for you, they are out there, but at times you may have to make a couple of practice runs the way I had to, but I was single 10 years between the second failed marriage and the forever marriage I'm in now. No matter how much you love someone, there has to be limits of what you can survive through with anybody, always show them that you love them bc anybody can say the I love you words. It's no joke, just like that ole saying, two hearts really has to beat as one, or they will get to far out of sink to fix it. My wife and I after 15 years still have to work on our marriage every day bc we both know getting to comfortable would bring failure. Anything worth having is worth whatever to keep it as long as it's what you both want as equal partners in life. And that is what the word marriage really means in the long haul, partners that love each other and are willing give and give in to keep your partnership thriving!!! Maybe different ways that works with others, but it does take two as one bc 1+1= 0 if your goals aren't the same!!!

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I hear ya man


Oct 5, 2018, 1:12 PM

4 years ago right about this time I was doing the same. It was disorienting and I can remember some dark days in there. And yeah, Clemson football was a welcomed escape during that time.

Keep your head up. I can honestly say, for me, things on this end of that life adjustment (and further adjustments that happen in time) have been much healthier and fulfilling.

You'll be in my prayers.

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Keep your head up man.


Oct 5, 2018, 1:13 PM

There’s a lot of good folks on here that will be praying for you.

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Clemson football has pulled me through some hard


Oct 5, 2018, 1:15 PM

times over the last 15 years or so. It's one constant you can count on. It sort of has a normalizing, stabilizing effect; helps you forget about everything else for a few hours. Sorry you are going through a hard time; hope it all works out.

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"Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard."
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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:18 PM

So sorry for what you are going through. Divorce is devastating for all involved. It helps to take the high road, if possible. Things do get better with time. God bless you, Tiger friend. I will be praying for you.

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:22 PM

For me, I think everything happens for a reason. Sometimes it takes years to understand how that is even possible for certain events. Learn from any possible mistakes and move forward. Those who can deal with change are the most successful, so just stay positive, and GOOD LUCK. :)

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:25 PM

They are making some really great "not-giving-a-f***" pills nowadays. Don't be afraid to ask for help from your doc.

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Amen to that.***


Oct 5, 2018, 3:34 PM



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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 7:03 PM [ in reply to Re: Been a rough few weeks for me ]

Not so fast.
This is a slippery slope that many people don’t recover from. Speaking of meds that is.

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:32 PM

I know this hurts terribly now but hard times do pass. Better days do finally come. Clemson football has also given me, and Im sure others too, many moments of precious relief from the drama of life. You’ll get through it but keep on falling back on things that help you get through the hardest moments. Trust God loves you no matter what.

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So sorry to hear that.


Oct 5, 2018, 1:33 PM

Happened to me a few years ago. But I found a wonderful woman that gave this old guy a chance and I couldn’t be happier. God has a plan, my friend!

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Re: Been a rough few weeks for me


Oct 5, 2018, 1:38 PM


Going through a surprise divorce. It’s amazing how small Clemson Football seems during this time. Not to be too personal but what gets me through each week is watching our Tigers play